Image by Travis Seitler via Flickr

(Jesus speaking) The Scripture says "I want kindness more than I want animal sacrifices." You don't really understand what those words mean. If you understood them, you would not judge those who have done nothing wrong. Matthew 12:7

(Jesus speaking) "Why do you notice the little piece of dust in your friend's eye, but you don't notice the big piece of wood in your own eye? How can you say to your friend, 'Friend, let me take that little piece of dust out of your eye' when you cannot see that big piece of wood in your own eye! You hypocrite! Frist, take the wood out of your own eye. Then you will see clearly to take the dust out of your friend's eye." Luke 6:41-42

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These verses bring up an interesting concept-Personal Responsibility. This is something that we, as a society, seem to be displaying less and less of as time goes on. We're often looking for someone or something to blame for our circumstances-whether it be relationship difficulties, job stress, financial problems or bigger challenges. We could blame our parents, our spouse, our kids, the pastor, our boss, our coworkers, our siblings, our neighbors.....anyone, really. We can also blame our circumstances "I was born poor" or "my family was so dsyfunctional" or "my spouse is such a jerk" or "the company I work for is so bad" etc etc.

The problem with blaming others is that blame keeps us stuck. If I blame my problems on someone else then I will feel powerless to change things and I will feel trapped. Feeling trapped will then lead to feelings of depression and/or anxiety. It's a vicious cycle...something happens, I look for someone to blame, I feel justified in my anger toward the person or situation I blame, and over time, resentment sets in and I begin to feel trapped and like a helpless victim. That cycle repeats until anxiety, depression and eventually despair take over. Does this sound like victorious Christian living to you?!? Surely, this is not how God intended for us to live.

The truth is that we all make choices in life. Sure, sometimes things happen that truly are not our fault-someone else makes a bad decision and we have to deal with the consequences. However, from my years of experience, I have learned that many times, the feelings of being trapped/stuck are of our own making. We make a choice to give up our power to someone else and we stay stuck.

So if we all make choices and we all have personal responsibility for our own lives what are we to do? The bottom line is that if your life is not the way that you want it, you MUST stop blaming others and consider what you are doing to contribute to the problem, especially the feeling of being trapped and powerless. I understand that bad things happen to people. However, because we cannot travel back in time to undo the bad thing that have happened-all we can do is work with the here and now. The present. This is where personal responsibility for our own lives comes into play. We cannot change what has happened to us, but we can change/decide/choose what we will do today.

Maybe it is time to formulate a plan and TAKE ACTION. If you don't take action, how will things ever change?

Some ideas for taking action:

* Call a trusted friend
* Talk to your pastor
* Call a Christian Counselor
* Join a small group Bible study
* Go to a 12 step meeting
* Ask for prayer and be specific
* Talk to your spouse


Take responsibility for your life-this is not a dress rehearsal.

Some thoughts about playing our part.....

Recently, I was reading Exodus 15: 22-27. From the New International Version:

The Waters of Marah and Elim

22 Then Moses led Israel from the Red Sea and they went into the Desert of Shur. For three days they traveled in the desert without finding water. 23 When they came to Marah, they could not drink its water because it was bitter. (That is why the place is called Marah. [fn5] ) 24 So the people grumbled against Moses, saying, “What are we to drink?”
25 Then Moses cried out to the Lord, and the Lord showed him a piece of wood. He threw it into the water, and the water became sweet.
There the Lord made a decree and a law for them, and there he tested them. 26 He said, “If you listen carefully to the voice of the Lord your God and do what is right in his eyes, if you pay attention to his commands and keep all his decrees, I will not bring on you any of the diseases I brought on the Egyptians, for I am the Lord, who heals you.”
27 Then they came to Elim, where there were twelve springs and seventy palm trees, and they camped there near the water.


When things look impossible, when we are on our last leg, at the end of our rope-with no strength left, this is when we (finally) cry out to God. And then miracles can happen.

Here's what stood out to me as I read this passage:

1) Israelites cried out (griped/complained)to Moses
2) Moses (their leader) cried out to God
3) God showed Moses a specific piece of wood, the NLT says branch.
4) Moses threw the specified piece of wood into the water
5) The water became sweet/drinkable

There is an order to this story. God CAN and DOES do supernatural miracles. And often, this is our preference-as if God were a genie in a bottle. We cry out in a way that says 'save me'. Often, from a mess we have created. Sometimes, from a mess others have dumped on us.

However, it seems to me that, more often than changing things in an instant, God waits for us to ask (ie, surrender) and then obey (ie, do) something. It's a partnership of sorts. I am not implying that God needs us, or that we are equal with God. That is simply not true. God is fully sovereign. God is God and we are not. And yet, He invites us to participate in His work. Will you accept His invitation?

We get to choose to cooperate with God or not. God honors our choices. What if Moses had doubted or questioned God? I can almost hear myself asking these questions:

"What am I supposed to do Lord?"
"A branch?!? Seriously?"
"Are you kidding me?"

What if Moses had wrung his hands in worry? Or kept praying, after God showed him the branch? "Nice branch, Lord, but we need water."

If Moses was not fully surrendered to God's will AND obedient, the story may have gone differently.

The challenge for us-for all of humanity, since the Fall is how to balance prayer with action. Everything we do ought to be bathed in prayer. It is first and foremost-vitally important. It is our lifeline to God the Father. Sometimes, we get busy, we forget, we make excuses. Or we try to do things on our own power and strength. I call this 'running ahead of God'. Then I have to stop and wait-and ask the Lord to clean up my mess. And He does. Because He is full of grace and love and mercy.

At some point, we have to take action, obey, do something, play our part. Sometimes it's move ahead. Sometimes it's go back. Sometimes it's let go. Sometimes it's pray and continue to wait.

Let's focus on the balance; tuning in to God's still small voice; so that we may know God is Great!

Today is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Back to School/Harvest Time

Since it is back to school time, I thought I would share a bit about Haiti and the Three Angels Christian Academy and a way that you can get involved and help make a difference!

This is taken from the Three Angels Children's Relief website (http://www.threeangelshaiti.org/)

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Haiti is a Caribbean country occupying the western third of Hispaniola, sharing the island with the Dominican Republic. It is about the size of the state of Maryland, 50 miles from Cuba, and 600 miles from Florida. It is only an hour and a half flight from Florida yet is the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere.

Haiti has historically been poverty stricken due to a variety of reasons including historical factors such as war and war debt, occupations and dictatorships, isolation and racism that are still impacting Haiti today along with current economic and environmental factors such as international aid sanctions, internal political conflict, deforestation that leads to soil erosion and flooding, hurricanes, etc.

The average Haitian earns less than $1 a day, and there have been estimates that 1 percent of the country's 8.1 million people controls nearly half its wealth (Mozingo). More than half of Haitians eight million people lack access to clean water or sanitation. Fifty percent of the population is undernourished, with one in five children underweight or under-height for their age. Twelve percent of Haitian children die before their first birthday, and one third do not make it to their 5th birthday (globalsecurity.org).

According to a 2004 U.N. report, Haiti ranks with Afghanistan and Somalia as one of three countries of the world with the worst daily caloric deficit per person with 2.4 million Haitians unable to afford the minimum 2,240 daily calories recommended by the World Health Organization. In addition, only 1 in every 10,000 Haitians has access to a physician (globalsecurity.org). A 2005 report declares Haiti the second worst place in the world to live (Moyes). Haiti is the fifth most corrupt nation in the world for 2005, according to Transparency International, a global watchdog group who publish an annual list of corruption levels in 159 nations. Haiti was tied for the most corrupt country in 2004.

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The Bible tells us: "These were his instructions to them: "The harvest is so great, but the workers are so few. Pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest, and ask him to send out more workers for his fields. " (Luke 10:2)

I'm writing to let you know about a SIMPLE way that you can help. Maybe you can't adopt a child. Maybe you can't travel to Haiti to work on construction projects. But there is something you CAN do...read on for more info.....

Visit here to help today! Please consider sponsoring a student.
http://www.threeangelshaiti.org/sponsorship.htm

Three Angels Children's Relief opened Three Angels Christian Academy (TACA) aka Institution Mixte Chretienne de Petion-Ville in 2005. TACA serves nearly 400 students in a 2 room building on the Three Angels Campus. There is a huge need for inexpensive, quality schools in Haiti. Well over half of the adult population is illiterate. Most of the children currently attending would not have the opportunity to attend a school without TACA opening and granting scholarships. Without an education there is no way out of the cycle of poverty.



Children in Haiti are starving. The students that attend TACA are hungry too-and you can help! Many of them do not get regular meals at home. At this time, TACA provides 1 meal of bread and peanut butter. For many, this is the only meal they get in a day. The goal is to get sponsorships for all the students, so that a full meal of beans, rice and milk can be provided. The only way that this goal can be reached is via the student sponsorship program. For less than $1.00 per day, you can change the life of a child, and change the world. What better way to change things that to feed and educate a student. For $27 a month you can help end the cycle of poverty.

To learn more about this program (it's very simple to do) visit http://www.threeangelshaiti.org/sponsorship.htm $27.00 a month

Imagine the difference that $1.00 can make in the life of these students! It would not be hard to figure out a way to give up something that costs less than a dollar a day to help.

Matthew 6:19-21 says:

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

God's calling-the harvest is great and the workers are few. Will you answer?

Visit http://www.threeangelshaiti.org/sponsorship.htm
to make a difference TODAY!

Three Angels is a non profit, volunteer run organization.

Foreign Exchange Student

Hi,

This is an email I got from Marge at NWSE-she's with the agency that placed Lee (our high school age foreign exchange student from S. Korea) in our house for this school year. I thought I would post here to pass the word.

Note that she said if anyone I refer does become a host family, NWSE would make a donation to my favorite charity-which of course would be Three Angels.....so, you can help a high school student, and orphans at the same time!If you have any questions about the process-I'm happy to tell you what I know.

Otherwise, contact Marge directly. Just be sure to let her know you heard about the program from me-so that I can get the donation directed to Three Angels (www.ThreeAngelsHaiti.org)Thanks for reading/considering it. Feel free to share with anyone else you can think of that would make a good host family.

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Just a short note to all of you - NWSE is in the final 3 weeks of placing our remaining students. If you know of a family or individual that would enjoy sharing their home and life with an exchange student - even as a welcome family (4 to 6 weeks) - anywhere in the US, please let me know.

We have about 25 students left - Girls from Mexico, Japan, Russia, Germany, South Korea, Brazil, Thailand and Kyrgyzstan Boys from Germany, Ukraine, Thailand, Columbia, Brazil, China, & Poland.

NWSE will make a donation to your favorite charity for referals you offer that do result in a student being placed.

The remaining students can be viewed on our website at www.nwse.com/profiles sign in nwsehost password hosting

Thank you for helping spread the word of cultural exchange

Marge Ryan, Regional Manager NWSE
Phone 262 245 5717
Fax 775 305 0329 or 800 613 5105
Skype Marge.Ryan
www.nwse.com
NWSE is a Department of State-designated nonprofit organization listed with CSIET
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The Power To Choose

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The heat is on! As the calendar turns to summer, it is easy to fall into the trap of complaining about the heat, especially here in Arizona. I wonder what would happen if we all took up a challenge to give thanks for the heat? The fact is that there is no perfect place to live and I know that I wouldn’t trade summers here for winters back east. I can still remember the bone-chilling cold and having to scrape ice off the windshields and sidewalks. I don’t miss any of that. This year, let’s make an effort to focus on the blessings of living in this place rather than focusing on the scorching heat. 2 Corinthians 4:17-18 tells us:

For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever. (emphasis added).


This is a great reminder of the CHOICE we face every day, every moment. The Truth is that our troubles (and the summer heat) won’t last forever. No matter what our circumstances or situation, it will not last forever. We get to CHOOSE what we focus on. The fact is, there will be trouble and suffering in our lives. Jesus told us this. At times, the trouble and suffering are enormous. However, the fact is also that there are a great many blessings and gifts in life to be thankful for as well. Because God gave us a brain and the ability to think, we are free to CHOOSE what we focus on. Paul wrote “So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. “ What we look at and focus on is a choice!

I have learned that if I look for things to criticize, gripe and complain (i.e., whine) about, I will find them. Alternatively, if I look for blessings and gifts to be grateful for and enjoy, I will find those as well. It is a daily, conscious choice to focus on being thankful for the blessings in my life. To me, it is like changing the channel. If something I do not like comes on the television, I have the ability to change the channel or shut the TV off. It is the same with my thoughts. I must begin by paying attention to my thoughts. Often, I am guilty of rushing through life, running from one activity or task to the next, so busy, that I don’t even notice my thoughts. By focusing my attention, I can notice if there are thoughts that need to be changed. When I pay attention to my thoughts, I can then make a CHOICE to do something differently if necessary.

With summer vacation upon us, school getting out, and Bible studies taking a break, our tendency can be to let connection and fellowship take a back seat. This summer, why not make a choice to do something different to stay connected. Perhaps you can schedule a coffee date or a play date. Or maybe invite a friend to lunch or choose a book to read and discuss. Become aware of what you focus on. Talk about spiritual things-ask your friends what God is doing in their lives and how you can pray for them. Stretch out of your comfort zone and do something different. It is only when we stretch and challenge ourselves that growth can take place. The Bible says:

By helping each other with your troubles, you truly obey the law of Christ.
Galatians 6:2

Remember, God gave us the ability to make choices. So make a good one today. Start by being thankful for what you do have. If you woke up this morning, you have something to be grateful for!



Lena Wright is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Board Certified Professional Christian Counselor and a Certified Professional Coach. Her passion is helping women be all that God created them to be. She can be reached through her website at www.LenaWright.com where you can obtain a free subscription to her Healthy Communication e-Bulletin.


Got a question for the coach? Email Lena@LenaWright.com

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

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October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month


My mom, Judy, died in 2005 after a long battle with this disease. In her memory, I have decided that I will make a donation to the Wellness Community here in Phoenix. The money will come from my businesses (sale of books, nutritional products, counseling/coaching fees). You can read more about the Wellness Community by visiting http://www.twccaz.org/. I really like their philosophy and they offer a great many services to people impacted by cancer.

Be sure that you are doing your monthly breast exams. Here's a good 'how to guide' http://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/testing/self_exam/bse_steps.jsp. Send this reminder and link to all the women that you care about.

Other simple prevention tips:

Eat more fresh veggies
Eat more fresh fruit
Move more
Drink more water
Cleanse your body of impurities/toxins
Eliminate fast food from your life
Manage your stress levels
Keep your life in balance

Here's to your health!

Lena


Lena Wright
Founder & President, Connections Wellness Center
Licensed Professional Counselor
Board Certified Professional Christian Counselor
Certified Professional Coach

1-800-927-1450
623-297-4756

http://www.connectionswellnesscenter.com/

Are you toxic? Watch the video at drspeakout.com to learn more!


~Integrity~Freedom~Wellness~Family~Passion~Purpose~Personal Excellence~

Motives

I have been thinking about the concept of motives lately. I sometimes enjoy watching crime dramas on television, particularly Law and Order and CSI. On these shows, the detectives are trying to solve a homicide and they always look for a motive or the reason why the criminal might have committed the crime. Three of the definitions of the word motive found at Dictionary.com include:

1) something that causes a person to act in a certain way, do a certain thing
2) incentive, causing, or tending to cause, motion
3) prompting to action

Basically, motive is the reason behind our behavior, the incentive that prompts us to act. On these television programs the motive for the crime is often greed, rage, jealousy or fear. Motives can be either negative or positive. Sometimes we are motivated by love, caring and compassion to do something thoughtful for another person.

In the movie, Talladega Nights, we are shown several examples of how wrong motives can cost us dearly. Ricky Bobby played by Will Ferrell is a NASCAR racing legend whose motto is “If you’re not first, you’re last” which drives him to compete fiercely and win at any cost at the expense of his relationships with those closest to him. Ricky Bobby’s’ fierce competitiveness and drive to win by taking thrilling risks made him a fan favorite. It is a funny movie with an interesting lesson underneath the humor.

God has something to say about motives. James 4:3 says “And even when you do ask, you don't get it because your whole motive is wrong-you want only what will give you pleasure.”

And Proverbs 20:27 says “The Lord's searchlight penetrates the human spirit, exposing every hidden motive.”

Have you ever stopped to think about what your motives are-your reasons for doing the things that you do? God is concerned about the condition of our hearts in all areas of our lives. He knows WHY we’re doing something, even when we sometimes fail to make the connection.

When we truly understand what God wants for us-our growth and the development of the traits of Christ in us-it becomes clear that God would be concerned with our motives-the WHY behind what we do. For example, do you attend church because you ‘should’ or ‘have too’? That is an example of a wrong motive. God could force us to worship Him; He is God, after all. And yet, that is not the sort of relationship he desires with us. He wants us to choose Him and to choose to pursue a relationship with Him.

Parents and teachers sometimes make a choice to control children out of fear by using intimidation, punishment and threats. Sure, children will comply out of fear when you’re around to enforce the consequences-but what about when you’re not there? Wouldn’t it be better to teach kids about motives-about right and wrong so that they can learn to make good choices and control their own behavior? This is called self-regulation and it is a skill that many people are lacking in today’s world. I believe this is the same thing that God wants from us. Not for us do things because we ‘should’ or we ‘ought to’ but because we want to. When we cultivate an attitude of gratitude (start by writing down 5 things you are grateful for each morning and evening and reading your list out loud) and when we recognize exactly what God has done for us then we want to give, we want to serve, we want to help, and we want to be kind.

I encourage you to examine your motives. Not to beat yourself up about all the ways you fall short, but as the basis for learning and growing. If you find that your life is overrun with ‘shoulds’ perhaps you will want to seek some assistance in looking at your motives and making some positive changes in your thinking and your life. Remember, every journey starts with a single step.



Lena Wright is the founder and President of Connections Wellness Center and a Certified Professional Coach and a Board Certified Professional Christian Counselor. Her passion is helping women find peace and contentment so they may enjoy healthy relationships and be all that God has created them to be. She can be reached through her website at http://www.connectionswellnesscenter.com/.

© 2007 Permission is granted to reprint this article in print or on your web site so long as the paragraph above is included and contact information is provided to http://www.connectionswellnesscenter.com/.